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Well then what do you do in your spare time?;)

On a road trip working we ran out of money. None of us had a credit card, and the only Western Union we could find had a sign on the counter that said “be back soon”. We pooled our pocket change and bought a ten pack of frozen burritos and thawed them in a bathroom sink of hot water.

That works with beer too. When we got married, my wife would give me “the eye” and hold up one or two fingers to indicate how many beers I could have. I fixed that with a kegerator and a bucket. She folded. Now after six kids and a gaggle of grandkids, she’s swilling more than me.

That’s good!

She says it’s time to change my socks.

Had one. No, I’d call it a Blessing!

I think my wife likes growing it because it’s one of the first big thangs to pluck from the vine, and it keeps going and growing :ROFLMAO: She was born a squash …..er’ I mean peach, PEACH!) She , never mind here she comes

I caint help it wear you go to church!:ROFLMAO:

I’m normally a very emotionally reserved man, so when I’m just sitting outside with my wife, and I start busting a gut laughing, she starts laughing too. Thank you! (Sorry for the run-on sentence. Too lazy to fix it.)

We do the same with squash and okra about this time of year

No. I quit driving fast a couple decades ago. I figured life was going by too fast, so I’ve been doing everything as slow as I can :ROFLMAO:, so it’ll take longer before I’m being spoon fed. If it matters to you, I am able to drink an extra beer or three to Slow Ride, and a lot of other...

I think she’s jealous. My dog never cares what I’m doing, unless I’m doing something without him.

I felt my butt vibrating. My wife called. Since I’m playing hooky, she’s thinking up new chores for me. In her Johnny imitating June’s voice (“honey, take me fo a spin”), she says “mow that spot on the back side of the garden!” I want you all to know that I wear the pants in this family! She...

That’s Steve Martin’s brother.

Well, I had to do it. Something didn’t seem right this morning. I gave the Boss a kiss and headed out for my day job, but not without checking on a heifer near ready to calve. She was fine, but the grass needs clipped. While I was looking at cow butts and udder judging, the Boss went to work...

Sometimes we just need a break, or to brake (as in full stop). Then start again.

When I would get into trouble doing stupid stuff with friends, Mom would say “you can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friends nose”. I’m still working on figuring out what she meant! But thinking it’s similar to what you just said!

"I wholeheartedly disagree with what you just said, but I'll fight to death to protect your right to say it". Who said it?