Since she never had a chance for the calf to suck, she does not equate "milking" with relief. Since she did not have the problems that the older cow had with the mastitis, why would you not let the calf suck ? ,
Pet cows are the worst PITA to get accustomed to milking. The nice "gentling" usually does not work....they are prima donna's and usually are b@#ches....
She already knows now that she can intimidate you....
Hobble her, and keep the chain/strap between the back legs short so she can't kick without it throwing her down by pulling the other leg out from under her; and/or using a rope tied around her just in front of the udder, cinched up tight like a belt... will put pressure on the nerve on the back and will sometimes help to stop the kicking...used to use that on a couple of ornery heifers on one dairy.
They make an "anit-kick" device that is adjustable (metal)... looks like an angled "C" shape somewhat, that catches just under skin on the flank, and the other end goes up over the back... same idea of a rope cinched up... puts pressure on the nerve somewhat... and gives them something else to think about so not concentrating on the milking...
I have always milked with their calf right there with them so they are calm and not "worrying" about their baby, for the first 2-3 milkings... I will keep the calf in, bring cow in to the calf, and it gets to suck... and they usually let me milk on the other side... then after a day or 2, they don't get too upset that they are getting milked and they are not getting the calf... but the first couple milkings, the calf gives them the incentive to be milked, stimulates the letdown, along with getting fed in the stall/stanchion... and they associate it with relief.
Good luck....