SF
Well-known member
Women as explained by engineers
- Thread starter SF
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cowgirl580
Well-known member
:shock: :lol: :lol: :lol:
cajun critter
Well-known member
Turn about is fair play ;-)
HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION SHEET
=======================================
MATERIALS SAFETY DATA SHEET
MEN - A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS
ELEMENT: MAN
ATOMIC WEIGHT: Accepted as 170 lbs, known to vary from 98 to 360 lbs
SYMBOL: EGO
DISCOVERER: Eve. Discovered by accident one day when she had a craving for ribs.
OCCURANCE: Large quantities in all populated areas. Highly concentrated deposits at all sporting events and areas known as "singles bars". Extremely low quantities can be found in any
location where cleaning up is required. (See Women and Slave
Labor)
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1) Surface often covered with hair-bristly in some areas, soft in
others.
2) Boils when inconvenienced, freezes when faced with Logic &
Common Sense.
3) Melts if treated like a God.
4) Can cause headaches and severe body aches; handle with extreme caution.
5) Specimens can be found in various states ranging from deeply sensitive to extremely thick.
6) Becomes stubborn and unyielding when pressure is applied;
yields only when subtlety, subterfuge, flattery are applied.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1) Is repelled by concentrated quantities of precious and
semi-precious metals and stones (See Jewelery Store).
However, is attracted to small quantities of these when viewed
worn against the skin of a woman. It is believed woman's skin
combines with the aforementioned to create a highly magnetic
attraction for this element.
2) May explode spontaneously if wallet is opened.
3) Requires copious quantities of substances known as attention, reassurance, and stroking.
4) When saturated with Alcohol will be fairly inert and will
repel most other elements.
5) Is repelled by most household appliances and common household cleansers.
6) Is repelled by small children clothed in diapers, particularly
those of the malodorous variety.
7) Is rendered non-functional when confronted with the items in
#5 & #6.
8) Is neutral to common courtesy and fairness.
9) Is impervious to embarrassment.
10) Most powerful embittering and aggravating agent known to
woman.
HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION SHEET
=======================================
MATERIALS SAFETY DATA SHEET
MEN - A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS
ELEMENT: MAN
ATOMIC WEIGHT: Accepted as 170 lbs, known to vary from 98 to 360 lbs
SYMBOL: EGO
DISCOVERER: Eve. Discovered by accident one day when she had a craving for ribs.
OCCURANCE: Large quantities in all populated areas. Highly concentrated deposits at all sporting events and areas known as "singles bars". Extremely low quantities can be found in any
location where cleaning up is required. (See Women and Slave
Labor)
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1) Surface often covered with hair-bristly in some areas, soft in
others.
2) Boils when inconvenienced, freezes when faced with Logic &
Common Sense.
3) Melts if treated like a God.
4) Can cause headaches and severe body aches; handle with extreme caution.
5) Specimens can be found in various states ranging from deeply sensitive to extremely thick.
6) Becomes stubborn and unyielding when pressure is applied;
yields only when subtlety, subterfuge, flattery are applied.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1) Is repelled by concentrated quantities of precious and
semi-precious metals and stones (See Jewelery Store).
However, is attracted to small quantities of these when viewed
worn against the skin of a woman. It is believed woman's skin
combines with the aforementioned to create a highly magnetic
attraction for this element.
2) May explode spontaneously if wallet is opened.
3) Requires copious quantities of substances known as attention, reassurance, and stroking.
4) When saturated with Alcohol will be fairly inert and will
repel most other elements.
5) Is repelled by most household appliances and common household cleansers.
6) Is repelled by small children clothed in diapers, particularly
those of the malodorous variety.
7) Is rendered non-functional when confronted with the items in
#5 & #6.
8) Is neutral to common courtesy and fairness.
9) Is impervious to embarrassment.
10) Most powerful embittering and aggravating agent known to
woman.
cowgirl580
Well-known member
:clap: :nod: :lol: :lol: :lol: now that one i really like.
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